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About Owl Quote
Copyright © 2022 OwlQuote.com and Spring Launch Media LLC. All Rights Reserved.

All content on this website ("the Site") is the property of Spring Launch Media LLC. The collection and assembly of content on this Site are the exclusive property of Spring Launch Media LLC and are protected by copyright and other intellectual property laws. All quotations remain the intellectual property of their respective owners. We do not asset any claim of copyright for individual quotations. The use of quotations is done under the fair use copyright principal.

Demetri Martin Quotes Share
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https://owlquote.com/i/q/owlquote__quotes?b=&a=&d=&_n=25
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I do come across... I do come across people who don't like me, don't like my comedy, don't think it's funny, it's too cutesy, or whatever they hate. And it's like, 'Okay. That's your opinion. Somebody liked it, so that's good.' Hopefully it balances out.
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I do come across people… copied to clipboard
I love women, but... I love women, but I feel like you can't trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the park and I met this girl, she was cute and she had a dog. And I went up to her, we started talking. She told me her dog's name. Then I said, 'Does he bite?' She said, 'No.' And I said, 'Oh yeah? Then how does he eat?' Liar.
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I love women, but I… copied to clipboard
I think a lot... I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming.
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I think a lot of… copied to clipboard
I think since I... I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny.
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I think since I was… copied to clipboard
I wanna make a... I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that's 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says 'go outside.'
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I wanna make a jigsaw… copied to clipboard
I wrapped my Christmas... I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.
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I wrapped my Christmas presents… copied to clipboard
If you can't tell... If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat!
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If you can't tell a… copied to clipboard
It's funny: when people... It's funny: when people always talk about the importance of role models, I used to think that was so exaggerated, but as I get older, I start to realize I don't feel that way so much anymore. If you see somebody like you who's doing something, an older version of what you are, it does make you feel like it's more possible.
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It's funny: when people always… copied to clipboard
Stand up is really... Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away.
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Stand up is really fun… copied to clipboard
The comedians I liked... The comedians I liked were Bill Cosby and Steven Wright, like just always as a comedic actor. I always liked Gary Larson, who's really funny for a cartoonist, obviously.
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The comedians I liked were… copied to clipboard