Explore inspirational quotes.
| In America, anyone can... | In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem. Copy Copy In America, anyone can become⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| In comic strips, the... | In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first. Copy Copy In comic strips, the person⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Inside every cynical person,... | Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. Copy Copy Inside every cynical person, there⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Isnât it a bit... | Isnât it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do âpracticeâ? Copy Copy Isnât it a bit unnerving⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| I've begun worshipping the... | I've begun worshipping the sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, and a lovely day. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don't have to dress up, and there's no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to 'God' are all answered at about the same 50% rate. Copy Copy I've begun worshipping the sun⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Just cause you got... | Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town. Copy Copy Just cause you got the⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Laugh often, long and... | Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. Copy Copy Laugh often, long and loud.⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Life gets really simple... | Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school. Copy Copy Life gets really simple once⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Life is not measured... | Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. Copy Copy Life is not measured by⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| May the forces of... | May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. Copy Copy May the forces of evil⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Men are from Earth,... | Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. Copy Copy Men are from Earth, women⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Meowâ means âwoofâ in... | Meowâ means âwoofâ in cat. Copy Copy Meowâ means âwoofâ in cat. copied to clipboard | ||
| Most people work just... | Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit. Copy Copy Most people work just hard⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Never argue with an... | Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. Copy Copy Never argue with an idiot.⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Never underestimate the power... | Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Copy Copy Never underestimate the power of⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Not only do I... | Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did. Copy Copy Not only do I not⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| One can never know... | One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like. Copy Copy One can never know for⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| One tequila, two tequila,... | One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. Copy Copy One tequila, two tequila, three⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| People who say they... | People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think. Copy Copy People who say they don't⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| People who see life... | People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point. Copy Copy People who see life as⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Religion is just mind... | Religion is just mind control. Copy Copy Religion is just mind control. copied to clipboard | ||
| Religion is like a... | Religion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes. Copy Copy Religion is like a pair⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Scratch any cynic and... | Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist. Copy Copy Scratch any cynic and you⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Some people see the... | Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that's twice as big as it needs to be. Copy Copy Some people see the glass⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Some people see things... | Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that. Copy Copy Some people see things that⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Standing ovations have become... | Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another. Copy Copy Standing ovations have become far⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Tell people there's an... | Tell people there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure. Copy Copy Tell people there's an invisible⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| That's why they call... | That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it. Copy Copy That's why they call it⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| The caterpillar does all... | The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. Copy Copy The caterpillar does all the⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| The main reason Santa... | The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. Copy Copy The main reason Santa is⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| The most unfair thing... | The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! Whatâs that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when youâre too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until youâre young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating â¦and you finish off as an orgasm. Copy Copy The most unfair thing about⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| The other night I... | The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going. Copy Copy The other night I ate⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| The reason I talk... | The reason I talk to myself is because Iâm the only one whose answers I accept. Copy Copy The reason I talk to⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| The very existence of... | The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done. Copy Copy The very existence of flame-throwers⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| The very existence of... | The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, 'You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but Iâm just not close enough to get the job done. Copy Copy The very existence of flamethrowers⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| There are nights when... | There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. Copy Copy There are nights when the⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| There's no present. There's... | There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past. Copy Copy There's no present. There's only⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Think of how stupid... | Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. Copy Copy Think of how stupid the⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Weather forecast for tonight:... | Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning. Copy Copy Weather forecast for tonight: dark.⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| Well, if crime fighters... | Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they? Copy Copy Well, if crime fighters fight⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| What does it mean... | What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on? Copy Copy What does it mean to⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| When I ask how... | When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' 'He's two' will do just fine. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place. Copy Copy When I ask how old⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| When someone is impatient... | When someone is impatient and says, 'I haven't got all day,' I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day? Copy Copy When someone is impatient and⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| When Thomas Edison worked... | When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. Copy Copy When Thomas Edison worked late⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| When you step on... | When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands. Copy Copy When you step on the⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| When you're born into... | When you're born into this world, you're given a ticket to the freak show. If you're born in America you get a front row seat. Copy Copy When you're born into this⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| When you're born you... | When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat. Copy Copy When you're born you get⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| You know an odd... | You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar. Copy Copy You know an odd feeling?⦠copied to clipboard | ||
| You know the good... | You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. Copy Copy You know the good part⦠copied to clipboard |
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