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Ron Swanson: I just want to get the work over... Share
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Quote I just want to get the work over as soon as possible so I can do some fishing. Fishing relaxes me. It's like yoga except I still get to kill something.
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Find on Amazon Ron Swanson

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Keep your tears in...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Keep your tears in your eyes where they belong. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
There is only one...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation There is only one bad word: taxes. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
The whole point of...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation The whole point of this country is if you want to eat garbage, balloon up to 600 pounds and die of a heart attack at 43, you can! You are free to do so. To me, that’s beautiful. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
I think that all...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation I think that all government is a waster of taxpayer money. My dream is to have the park system privatized and run entirely by for profit corporations, like Chuck E. Cheese. They have an impeccable business model. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Fishing is for sport...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Fishing is for sport only. Fish meat is practically a vegetable. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Barbecues should be about...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Barbecues should be about one thing: good shared meat. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
The government is a...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation The government is a greedy piglet that suckles on a taxpayer’s teat until they have sore, chapped nipples. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
When I eat, it...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation When I eat, it is the food that is scared. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
My idea of a...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation My idea of a perfect government is one guy who sits in a small room at a desk, and the only thing he’s allowed to decide is who to nuke. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
The less I know...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation The less I know about other people’s affairs, the happier I am. I’m not interested in caring about people. I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation

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Strippers do nothing for...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Strippers do nothing for me…but I will take a free breakfast buffet anytime, anyplace. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Fishing relaxes me. It’s...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Fishing relaxes me. It’s like yoga; except I still get to kill something. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
There are three acceptable...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation There are three acceptable haircuts: high and tight, crew cut, buzz cut. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
When I walked in...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation When I walked in this morning and saw that the flag was half-mast, I thought ‘All right, another bureaucrat ate it! Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
So you talked to...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation So you talked to Tammy? What's it like to stare into the eye of Satan's butthole? Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Under my tutelage, you...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. From men into gladiators. And from gladiators into Swansons. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
I've been developing the...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation I've been developing the Swanson Pyramid of Greatness for years. It's a perfectly calibrated recipe for maximum personal achievement. Categories include Capitalism: God's way of determining who is smart and who is poor. Crying: acceptable at funerals and the Grand Canyon. Rage. Poise. Property rights. Fish: for sport only, not for meat. Fish meat is practically a vegetable. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Haircuts, there are three...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Haircuts, there are three acceptable haircuts: High and tight, crew cut, buzz cut. Are the scissors broken in your house, son? Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Veganism is the sad...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Veganism is the sad result of a morally corrupt mind. Reconsider your life. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Dear frozen yogurt. You...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Dear frozen yogurt. You are the celery of desserts. Be ice cream, or be nothing. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation

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Listen, I've eaten a...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Listen, I've eaten a commissary hamburger for lunch every day for twelve years. I just wanted to make sure this pointless health crusade won't affect the only part of my job that I like. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
I don’t want to...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation I don’t want to paint with a broad brush here, but every single contractor in the world is a miserable, incompetent thief. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Breakfast food can serve...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Breakfast food can serve many purposes. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Child labor laws are...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Child labor laws are ruining this country. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Birthdays were invented by...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Birthdays were invented by Hallmark to sell cards. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
I am only here...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation I am only here because I owe Leslie a thousand favors. I'm not big on charities. Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Don’t teach a man to fish, and you feed yourself. He’s a grown man. Fishing’s not that hard. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
Spending the day outside...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation Spending the day outside alone sounds like a dream. I love being a father, but there are a few things I miss: silence, the absence of noise, one single moment undisturbed by a children’s tv program called Doc McStuffins. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
You’ve accidentally given me...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation You’ve accidentally given me the food that my food eats. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
History began July 4th,...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation History began July 4th, 1776. Anything before that was a mistake. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation
I’m a simple man....
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation I’m a simple man. I like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation

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You’ll get over it…...
Quote: Jeanette Winterson Love You’ll get over it… It’s the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life for ever. You don’t get over it because ‘it is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never closes. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not made anodyne by death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no-one else can fit it. Why would I want them to? Jeanette Winterson Love
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I just want to...
Quote: Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation I just want to get the work over as soon as possible so I can do some fishing. Fishing relaxes me. It's like yoga except I still get to kill something. Ron Swanson Parks and Recreation