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George Carlin: When you're born into this world, you're given... Share
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Quote When you're born into this world, you're given a ticket to the freak show. If you're born in America you get a front row seat.
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Find on Amazon George Carlin

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Most people don't grow...
Quote: Maya Angelou Most people don't grow up. It's too damn difficult. What happens is most people get older. That's the truth of it. They honor their credit cards, they find parking spaces, they marry, they have the nerve to have children, but they don't grow up. Maya Angelou
In a magazine, one...
Quote: Maya Angelou In a magazine, one can get - from cover to cover - 15 to 20 different ideas about life and how to live it. Maya Angelou
The shortest and surest...
Quote: Socrates The shortest and surest way to live with honour in the world, is to be in reality what we would appear to be; and if we observe, we shall find, that all human virtues increase and strengthen themselves by the practice of them. Socrates
There's no art to...
Quote: William Shakespeare There's no art to find the mind's construction in the face. William Shakespeare
The best way to...
Quote: Marcus Aurelius The best way to avenge yourself is to not be like that. Marcus Aurelius
I've spent too much...
Quote: Billy Graham I've spent too much time giving speeches, traveling the world. Billy Graham
Standing as I do,...
Quote: Abraham Lincoln Standing as I do, with my hand upon this staff, and under the folds of the American flag, I ask you to stand by me so long as I stand by it. Abraham Lincoln
Oh, yes; you Virginians...
Quote: Abraham Lincoln Oh, yes; you Virginians shed barrels of perspiration while standing off at a distance and superintending the work your slaves do for you. It is different with us. Here it is every fellow for himself, or he doesn't get there. Abraham Lincoln
Merchant and pirate were...
Quote: Friedrich Nietzsche Merchant and pirate were for a long period one and the same person. Even today mercantile morality is really nothing but a refinement of piratical morality. Friedrich Nietzsche
That's a crooked tree....
Quote: Bob Ross That's a crooked tree. We'll send him to Washington. Bob Ross

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Democracy means simply the...
Quote: Oscar Wilde Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people. Oscar Wilde
Now he had recognized...
Quote: George Orwell Now he had recognized himself as a dead man it became important to stay alive as long as possible. George Orwell
Animation can explain whatever...
Quote: Walt Disney Animation can explain whatever the mind of man can conceive. This facility makes it the most versatile and explicit means of communication yet devised for quick mass appreciation. Walt Disney
I've never had a...
Quote: Maya Angelou I've never had a dislike for men. I've been badly treated by some. But I've been loved greatly by some. I married a lot of them. Maya Angelou
Discrimination is a hellhound...
Quote: Martin Luther King Jr. Discrimination is a hellhound that gnaws at Negroes in every waking moment of their lives to remind them that the lie of their inferiority is accepted as truth in the society dominating them. Martin Luther King Jr.
I am nothing; I...
Quote: Mother Teresa I am nothing; I am but an instrument, a tiny pencil in the hands of the Lord with which He writes what he likes. However imperfect we are, he writes beautifully. Mother Teresa
Every immigrant who comes...
Quote: Theodore Roosevelt Every immigrant who comes here should be required within five years to learn English or leave the country. Theodore Roosevelt
My father was a...
Quote: Stephen Hawking My father was a research scientist in tropical medicine, so I always assumed I would be a scientist, too. I felt that medicine was too vague and inexact, so I chose physics. Stephen Hawking
The wave of evil...
Quote: Ralph Waldo Emerson The wave of evil washes all our institutions alike. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Everyone is overridden by...
Quote: Rumi Everyone is overridden by thoughts; that’s why they have so much heartache and sorrow. Rumi

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What, if some day...
Quote: Friedrich Nietzsche What, if some day or night a demon were to steal after you into your loneliest loneliness and say to you: 'This life as you now live it and have lived it, you will have to live once more and innumerable times more' ... Would you not throw yourself down and gnash your teeth and curse the demon who spoke thus? Or have you once experienced a tremendous moment when you would have answered him: 'You are a god and never have I heard anything more divine. Friedrich Nietzsche
I work very hard,...
Quote: Maya Angelou I work very hard, and I play very hard. I'm grateful for life. And I live it - I believe life loves the liver of it. I live it. Maya Angelou
You cannot escape the...
Quote: Abraham Lincoln You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today. Abraham Lincoln
Learning is not child's...
Quote: Aristotle Learning is not child's play; we cannot learn without pain. Aristotle
The whole secret lies...
Quote: Sun Tzu The whole secret lies in confusing the enemy, so that he cannot fathom our real intent. Sun Tzu
All diseases run into...
Quote: Ralph Waldo Emerson All diseases run into one, old age. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Socialism needs to pull...
Quote: Winston Churchill Socialism needs to pull down wealth; liberalism seeks to raise up poverty. Socialism would destroy private interests, Liberalism would preserve [them] ... by reconciling them with public right. Socialism would kill enterprise; Liberalism would rescue enterprise from the trammels of privilege and preference. Socialism assails the preeminence of the individual; Liberalism seeks ... to build up a minimum standard for the mass. Socialism exalts the rule; Liberalism exalts the man. Socialism attacks capitalism; Liberalism attacks monopoly. Winston Churchill
A clever person solves...
Quote: Albert Einstein A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it. Albert Einstein
Indeed the safest road...
Quote: C. S. Lewis Indeed the safest road to Hell is the gradual one--the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts,...Your affectionate uncle, Screwtape. C. S. Lewis
India has 2,000,000 gods...
Quote: Mark Twain India has 2,000,000 gods and worships them all. In religion, all other countries are paupers; India is the only millionaire. Mark Twain

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The most unfair thing...
Quote: George Carlin Retirement The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What’s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating …and you finish off as an orgasm. George Carlin Retirement
When you're born into...
Quote: George Carlin When you're born into this world, you're given a ticket to the freak show. If you're born in America you get a front row seat. George Carlin
In the end, you're...
Quote: George Harrison Happiness, Happy In the end, you're trying to find God. That's the result of not being satisfied. And it doesn't matter how much money, or property, or whatever you've got, unless you're happy in your heart, then that's it. And unfortunately, you can never gain perfect happiness unless you've got that state of consciousness that enables that. George Harrison Happiness, Happy
Your real, new self...
Quote: C. S. Lewis Your real, new self (which is Christ's and also yours, and yours just because it is His) will not come as long as you are looking for it. It will come when you are looking for Him. Does that sound strange? The same principle holds, you know, for more everyday matters. Even in social life, you will never make a good impression on other people until you stop thinking about what sort of impression you are making. Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it. The principle runs through all life from top to bottom, Give up yourself, and you will find your real self. Lose your life and you will save it. Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favourite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end submit with every fibre of your being, and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in. C. S. Lewis
Our creator is the...
Quote: George Washington Carver Change Our creator is the same and never changes despite the names given Him by people here and in all parts of the world. Even if we gave Him no name at all, He would still be there, within us, waiting to give us good on this earth. George Washington Carver Change
You may have noticed...
Quote: C. S. Lewis You may have noticed that the books you really love are bound together by a secret thread. You know very well what is the common quality that makes you love them, though you cannot put it into words: but most of your friends do not see it at all, and often wonder why, liking this, you should also like that. Again, you have stood before some landscape, which seems to embody what you have been looking for all your life; and then turned to the friend at your side who appears to be seeing what you saw -- but at the first words a gulf yawns between you, and you realise that this landscape means something totally different to him, that he is pursuing an alien vision and cares nothing for the ineffable suggestion by which you are transported. Even in your hobbies, has there not always been some secret attraction which the others are curiously ignorant of -- something, not to be identified with, but always on the verge of breaking through, the smell of cut wood in the workshop or the clap-clap of water against the boat's side? Are not all lifelong friendships born at the moment when at last you meet another human being who has some inkling (but faint and uncertain even in the best) of that something which you were born desiring, and which, beneath the flux of other desires and in all the momentary silences between the louder passions, night and day, year by year, from childhood to old age, you are looking for, watching for, listening for? You have never had it. All the things that have ever deeply possessed your soul have been but hints of it -- tantalising glimpses, promises never quite fulfilled, echoes that died away just as they caught your ear. But if it should really become manifest -- if there ever came an echo that did not die away but swelled into the sound itself -- you would know it. Beyond all possibility of doubt you would say "Here at last is the thing I was made for". We cannot tell each other about it. It is the secret signature of each soul, the incommunicable and unappeasable want, the thing we desired before we met our wives or made our friends or chose our work, and which we shall still desire on our deathbeds, when the mind no longer knows wife or friend or work. While we are, this is. If we lose this, we lose all. C. S. Lewis
and sit on the...
Quote: Sarah Kane Love, Nature and sit on the steps smoking till your neighbour comes home and sit on the steps smoking till you come home and worry when you're late and be amazed when you're early and give you sunflowers and go to your party and dance till I'm black and be sorry when I'm wrong and happy when you forgive me and look at your photos and wish I'd known you forever and hear your voice in my ear and feel your skin on my skin and get scared when you're angry and your eye has gone red and the other eye blue and your hair to the left and your face oriental and tell you you're gorgeous and hug you when you're anxious and hold you when you hurt and want you when I smell you and offend you when I touch you and whimper when I'm next to you and whimper when I'm not and dribble on your breast and smother you in the night and get cold when you take the blanket and hot when you don't and melt when you smile and dissolve when you laugh and not understand why you think I'm rejecting you when I'm not rejecting you and wonder how you could think I'd ever reject you and wonder who you are but accept you anyway and tell you about the tree angel enchanted forest boy who flew across the ocean because he loved you and write poems for you and wonder why you don't believe me and have a feeling so deep I can't find words for it and want to buy you a kitten I'd get jealous of because it would get more attention than me and keep you in bed when you have to go and cry like a baby when you finally do and get rid of the roaches and buy you presents you don't want and take them away again and ask you to marry me and you say no again but keep on asking because though you think I don't mean it I do always have from the first time I asked you and wander the city thinking it's empty without you and want what you want and think I'm losing myself but know I'm safe with you and tell you the worst of me and try to give you the best of me because you don't deserve any less and answer your questions when I'd rather not and tell you the truth when I really don't want to and try to be honest because I know you prefer it and think it's all over but hang on in for just ten more minutes before you throw me out of your life and forget who I am and try to get closer to you because it's beautiful learning to know you and well worth the effort and speak German to you badly and Hebrew to you worse and make love with you at three in the morning and somehow somehow somehow communicate some of the overwhelming undying overpowering unconditional all-encompassing heart-enriching mind-expanding on-going never-ending love I have for you. Sarah Kane Love, Nature
One word, Ma'am," he...
Quote: C. S. Lewis One word, Ma'am," he said, coming back from the fire; limping, because of the pain. "One word. All you've been saying is quite right, I shouldn't wonder. I'm a chap who always liked to know the worst and then put the best face I can on it. So I won't deny any of what you said. But there's one more thing to be said, even so. Suppose we have only dreamed, or made up, all those things-trees and grass and sun and moon and stars and Aslan himself. Suppose we have. Then all I can say is that, in that case, the made-up things seem a good deal more important than the real ones. Suppose this black pit of a kingdom of yours is the only world. Well, it strikes me as a pretty poor one. And that's a funny thing, when you come to think of it. We're just babies making up a game, if you're right. But four babies playing a game can make a play-world which licks your real world hollow. That's why I'm going to stand by the play world. I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't any Aslan to lead it. I'm going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn't any Narnia. So, thanking you kindly for our supper, if these two gentlemen and the young lady are ready, we're leaving your court at once and setting out in the dark to spend our lives looking for Overland. Not that our lives will be very long, I should think; but that's a small loss if the world's as dull a place as you say. C. S. Lewis
When you're born you...
Quote: George Carlin When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat. George Carlin
You teach me now...
Quote: Emily Brontë Love You teach me now how cruel you've been - cruel and false. Why did you despise me? Why did you betray your own heart, Cathy? I have not one word of comfort. You deserve this. You have killed yourself. Yes, you may kiss me, and cry; and wring out my kisses and tears: they'll blight you - they'll damn you. You loved me - what right had you to leave me? What right - answer me - for the poor fancy you felt for Linton? Because misery, and degradation, and death, and nothing that God or Satan could inflict would have parted us, you, of your own will did it. I have no broken your heart - you have broken it; and in breaking it, you have broken mine. So much the worse for me that I am strong. Do I want to live? What kind of living will it be when you - Oh, God! would you like to lie with your soul in the grave? Emily Brontë Love